Friday, 4 September 2020

A Beginner's Guide to Butt Plugs


The thought of a butt plug always used to terrify, yet intrigued me. What if it got stuck? What if it hurt? WHAT IF THERE WAS POO EVERYWHERE? There are a whole series of things that aren’t really ideal, and I’m assuming since you’re reading this, at least one of these thoughts have crossed your mind, and I’m here to tell you that your worries are (mostly) unfounded.


It was only when I moved to China that I bit the bullet and decided this was as good a time as any to pop my butt cherry, if you will. I ordered a small silicone plug from TaoBao, and waited anxiously for a whole new world to arrive at my doorstep. At this time I was living with roommates that I worked with, and barely knew, so I was PRAYING none of them opened the package because I couldn't handle the awkward lingering eye contact over and mumbled questions a luminous pink butt plug in English, let alone Chinese.



It arrived the next day, because China is speedy and wonderful, and I arranged a nice little date night with myself. I won’t go into tremendous detail, because that’s between me and my plug, but good God if it didn’t change my life.


Your ass is loaded with nerves, so anal play can be very painful if you’re not properly prepared and relaxed. But don’t let that scare you off. Done right, anal play can be fucking wonderful and lead to some of the most intense orgasms you’ll have, whether that be with a partner or by yourself.



I want you to have the experience I had, so sit back, lube up and get ready, because here's some of my advice to you.




Start Small

Don’t let your eyes be bigger than your asshole. Don’t go straight to fisting if you’ve never had so much as a thermometer up your ass. That just spells disaster, trauma, and inflatable ring. Make sure you start small and build up. Mine was made from silicone and was about the size of my thumb, so it’s easy to clean and handle. Metal ones are okay too but will feel heavier. 


Use one with a flared base

When I say ‘flared base’ I mean one that won’t let the butt plug disappear into the abyss while you’re in the middle of the most mind-blowing orgasm you’ve ever had. I hate going to the Doctor at the best of times, and I certainly don’t want to have to go because I’ve got a butt plug stuck. It does happen to people, so be smart with your toys.


Use Plenty of Lube

If you feel like you have too much lube, you’re wrong. You can never have enough lube. You don’t want to have to fight to get it in there. The asshole is not self-lubricating, so you’ll need the help.


Relax

Slow and steady wins the butt plug race. Except it’s not a race at all. Don’t rush through the process. Make sure you’re nice and aroused, and relaxed. Your ass is a sensitive spot and can easily tear or become irritated, and will take a little while to heal, so try not to fuck it up. Take a few deep breaths, relax, and take your time. 


Clean Your Toys

When you’re done, clean your plug with hot water and soap, and let air dry. I use a special Tea Tree sex toy cleaner. If you don’t want to buy a specific cleaner, you can disinfect it in boiling water, if it doesn’t have a motor and isn’t made from porous materials. Just boil a pan of water and let them sit in the water for ten minutes, and voila! Germ-free butt toys.




My main piece of advice would be don’t dive into your asshole on a whim. Make sure you start slow and gentle and let your body adjust before you get too bold and start going for anything bigger. Just like a vagina, your asshole is a stretchy orifice, so working your way up to bigger items it totally doable. Take your time. Your asshole will thank you for it.






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